Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
