she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
