im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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