Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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