Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
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