ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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