she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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