just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
