He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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