Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
