i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
