yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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