oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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