Pants 0. Shit 1.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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