i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
