you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
