that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
