Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
