How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
