a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
