There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
