I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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