Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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