Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
