South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
we're so committed to being not committed
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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