at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Randomize