I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
