I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Hippo gnu deer
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
