My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize