my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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