a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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