I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
