i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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