he wants to bone in the snuggie
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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