I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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