Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
