Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize