Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
