Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
