We're like a lot better than the average bears
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.