what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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