Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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