So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Randomize