I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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