Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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