I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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