I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Randomize
