Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
