Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
