it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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