So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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