so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
