And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize